Insomnia
by Kholinar
Summary: [Elsanna - Oneshot] Elsa is up late again. Her memories keep haunting her, no matter how she tries to distract herself. Turns out she just needs someone else to distract her. Fluff and angst. Mostly fluff.


**A/N: Decided to re-release this as a standalone since I don't plan on continuing my previous work. Sorry about any confusion. **

**Okay, okay. So I have about a thousand scenarios running rampant through my brain. Most of them will follow my messed up headcannon and lounge around the same universe, so I think I'll end up with a dozen oneshots. Oh well. As always, thank you for reading! **

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_You must learn to control it. Fear will be your enemy._

Years..._years_ of hiding behind her own door. Afraid to leave, afraid of running into anyone. She felt imprisoned. She wasn't – not really. Her parents would never be so cruel. But she learned early that it was a bad idea to leave the small confines of her room. When she was anywhere else, she had to force herself to ignore her father's sidelong glances and the whispers from her mother. And it wasn't just her parents, the staff was worse. The people she grew up with, who _raised her_, would stare at her like she was some kind of ghost.

Which ended up being fitting, after all. She would slip through the halls, alone. Only at night, only when she could be sure no one would see her. She was absolutely desperate to be away from her cell of a room, and away from judging eyes.

It wasn't like that at first.

Right after the accident, she tried to pretend that what had happened wouldn't really affect her, that it would blow over. Her parents never said a word, but they flinched from her when she made any sudden movements, or went for a hug, or _walked in a room_. They were terrified of what she could do. When she was near Anna, they would gasp at every small gesture she made, their eyes full of fear, praying she wouldn't lose control. They loved her dearly, but she was dangerous.

She was never allowed to be alone outside of her bedroom. There was always a maid following her... but they would keep their distance, so obviously wanting to be anywhere else. They kept close to Anna as well, always ready to step between them. Ready to put a _stop _toher. At the end of that first week, when night fell she walked to their room finding her bed was gone, her dresser, her clothes... she knew her life had changed completely. She stopped trying to fight it. It took everything she had not to break down in front of Anna.

When her sister had asked her what was going on, she remembered the girl looking so adorably confused. She didn't remember which lie she told the other princess. Something about growing up, getting her own room, being more independent... when Anna inevitably started crying, she could barely hold her power in. The room got colder, her heart started beating faster. When she opened her mouth to comfort the princess, her breath frosted in the air. She panicked. She turned and fled. Anna yelled after her and she couldn't turn around, she kept running.

And to be completely honest, she had been running ever since.

Years later when everything went wrong, _of course_ she had tried to build herself an ice fortress. That was _just_ like her. Ugh. She had already built that impenetrable castle around her heart, why not try for the real thing? It was showy and extravagant and _huge_, and utterly utterly ridiculous. It was amazing that Anna was impressed and didn't burst out laughing at the sight of it. Her fortress, her creation, was everything she _wasn't_. It was the fusion of everything she saw in her sister, all of her beauty and light and radiance... the whole thing was a damn _shrine_ to Anna.

She had some issues.

Of course, it was subtle. Well, as subtle as a ridiculously colossal, frigid, monumental fortress of icy solitude could be. So she liked to show her affection in strange ways, okay? She was a lonely.

...but that was a long time ago.

Queen Elsa of Arendelle set down her book and sighed. She couldn't concentrate on the story at all. Taking trips down memory lane was a bad idea, and she knew better. She shook her head, attempting to rid herself of the thoughts. Besides, the present day was much better anyway.

Mostly.

She leaned back against the cushion, her eye twitching. She let out a small grunt and attempted moving, but flinched. Her leg was asleep.

It was only to be expected, of course. The woman in her lap was the one causing the pressure, curled up in a ball, her head underneath the queen's chin and resting in the crook of her neck. Elsa smiled down at her and contemplated moving the princess for a moment, but decided against it. She put her arms around her and lifted her slightly, then repositioned herself. After setting Anna back down, she moved the blanket over her shoulders so it could comfort the two of them.

She grimaced a bit, the tingly feeling in her leg not being the most wholly pleasant feeling. She looked down at Anna again and had to let out a small laugh.

"I swear, you sleep like the dead."

A mumble answered her from the folds of the blanket, the voice not entirely distinct and muffled against her sister's collar. This time, Elsa's laugh reverberated through the room. "Say that again, love?"

The redhead pulled her face away from the crook in Elsa's neck and looked up blinking, her eyes squinting to adjust to the light spilling from the fireplace. "I wa'sayin'...that..." a loud yawn, "Tha' I sleep perfec'ly normal, m'kay?"

Anna tried to frown grumpily at her older sister, but when Elsa's laugh turned into an incredibly _undignified_ giggle, she couldn't help but beam sleepily. It was so rare to see her sister let her guard down, and her giggle was infectious. She placed her hand to Elsa's cheek. "You're beautiful when you laugh."

The queen grinned. "Only when I laugh, huh? I must look like a witch most days."

Anna snorted, "A witch? No. More like a dignified and royal ice sorceress." She smirked, "Besides, witches have crooked noses. Your nose is nice."

Her older sister scoffed. "Good to know that the only thing saving me from ridicule and condemnation is my _nose_."

"Nah, your boobs are nice too."

Elsa had to purse her lips together to keep from laughing outright. She drew herself up and put on a queenly air, trying vainly to suppress another fit of giggles. "Ah yes, of course. My bosom manages to keep away my feelings of hatred towards the townsfolk. To think... if they weren't there, I would go into fits of rage and curse every man, woman and child in the city with my magic!"

Anna looked down to admire the topic of their conversation. "All the rage indeed. Have you seen how men look at you, Elsa? I'd go into fits too."

The older girl smirked at her sister mockingly. "I believe you already do, dear heart."

The redhead looked up to her older sister smiling, her eyes half lidded. "Damn right I do. Have you looked in the mirror lately? You have _sex hair _all thetime. Twenty-four seven. I just want to run my hands through it every time I see you. Do you know how hard it is to keep myself from jumping you in public?"

The queen laughed, "Sex hair, really?"

Anna nodded fervently and moved herself, standing up on one leg to get her balance so she could adjust her other leg to her sister's side. She leaned forward again and straddled Elsa, a sultry smile on her face.

Elsa had to force her body not to react to the new position her sister was in. She lightly laid her arms around Anna's hips but refused to allow her body to react any further. She just raised her eyebrow, silently questioning the other girl.

"Don't give me that look, you know what I mean."

Elsa's eyebrow only shot up higher.

"It looks like someone just ran their hands through your hair, but it's like that _constantly._" Anna moved her own hands to her sister's platinum locks, showing the woman exactly what she meant. "And that... maybe they were handling you a little too roughly."

Anna's hands stopped halfway down Elsa's scalp, and her hands curled, gripping her hair, pulling just ever-so-slightly.

Elsa had to fight back a moan. Her hands twitched and she gripped the redhead's waist a bit tighter, but she gave no other indication of the thoughts racing through her mind.

Anna's smile grew wider. "Oh, sensitive are we? I've gotta tuck that information away for later."

Elsa's resolve weakened and she pouted. "Does it have to be later?"

Her younger sister released a handful of hair and slid her fingers down her sister's cheek lovingly. She smiled down at the queen, then leaned down to peck her on the lips.

Elsa face grew sullen. "That's _it_?"

The princess cocked an eyebrow at her sister, who continued, "Here I am, the love of my life on _top_ of me in nothing but an overshirt, complementing my breasts and tugging my hair all sexily, looking sultry and absolutely _gorgeous_... and all I get is a _**peck**__?!"_

Anna burst out into a fit of giggles and Elsa frowned at her. The older girl let out a breath, sighing.

"Not fair, Anna."

The princess looked back at her older sister, still giggling and managed to speak around the laughter, "We can't now, love. The staff are going to be in here any minute now to clean up the library."

Elsa sighed at her, "You've been _sleeping_, they were in here hours ago."

Anna's eyebrows furrowed, suddenly concerned. "What time is it?"

Elsa shrugged. "Almost dawn, I think."

Anna blinked once. Twice. She looked blankly at her older sister for a solid twenty seconds.

The queen exhaled, "What?"

"Elsa."

"Mmhmm?"

"Dearest."

"Yes?" She looked questioningly at her younger sister, who was staring back at her earnestly.

"My heart. My dear one. My majesty and queen, my soul, my entire reason for being, and love of my life..."

Elsa would have blushed, but she was more confused than anything. "...yes?"

Anna deadpanned. "Why the _fuck_ are you still awake?"

Elsa let out an exasperated sigh and laughed. Her sister's face stayed mostly blank, but beneath the mocking exterior was a layer of concern.

The queen's face tightened, her laughter finding an edge of bitterness "You know me. I can never sleep."

Anna sighed. "Elsa..."

"It's okay, really."

The princess shook her head. "Dwelling again?"

Elsa didn't bother trying to hide her sad smile, her sister knew her all too well. She didn't reply, but she didn't have to. Anna already knew.

The younger sibling took the elder's face in both hands and leaned down, pressing their lips together. Elsa melted into the kiss, taking comfort in his sister's warmth and constant love. It didn't last long, but when Anna pulled away, the smile on her sister's face was genuine.

"It really is okay. The past is in the past. I have an actual life to look forward to, thanks to you."

Anna kissed her forehead tenderly. "You'll never be alone again, Elsa."

The queen pulled her into a tight hug, not saying a word.

Elsa moved back from the embrace minutes later, sighing contentedly. Her eyes drooped and she yawned. "We should get to bed."

Anna nodded and stood up from her lap, legs stretching out painfully. Elsa was right behind her, a steady hand on her back. She slipped an arm around her sister's waist and they walked upstairs together towards their rooms.

They made it to the queen's door and walked in, heading straight for the bed. They shoved off the extra pillows and unneeded blankets in silence and climbed in, immediately curling up around to each other. They shared a small kiss before both sets of eyes closed, shutting out the world.

Just as the sun burst into the horizon, the two sisters fell into a deep, deep sleep.


End file.
